The Golden Girls Do Collinsport

When Jonathan finished, he and a fair portion of the audience left the ballroom, but it wasn't quite time to pack things in for the banquet yet. More of a time to rest up before the big event, or do last-minute shopping or autograph-hunting from the actresses and dealers in the hall. I finally could work my way back up to the front row VIP seats and sit down. Whump. Now what? I'd have probably left, too, but my feet held me prisoner for the moment.

I am certainly glad I stuck around, for the group calling themselves the Collinsport Players put on a marvelous little skit, crossing the somewhat disparate TV universes of the Golden Girls and Dark Shadows!

It started out with the traditional broken-down car problem/needing travel help, I think. At least I seem to remember it that way. I'd written a similar plot years ago in my head (the better versions being with Carl Kolchak [Night Stalker] winding up in Collinsport, with JF playing the mysterious auto mechanic duffer who drops hints his way; or at least having Mrs. Jessica Fletcher trip over a body somewhere...[Murder She Wrote]). Anyway, it gets things started. Well, except for the car.

All the actors did very well, but I think the fellow who portrayed Dorothy really hit the mark! He did a fabulous Bea Arthur...

Here are Rose, Blanche, Dorothy and Sophia (Ma), Collinsport Player-style. This is Willie, and of course Barnabas, working in some timely Johnny Depp-Barnabas jokes...

...Playing things up rather campily to the hilt...

Sophia and Dorothy meet Barnabas Collins. After a fashion, anyway. Barnabas permits them to spend the night at the Old House. Especially the naïve Rose Nyland... Barnabas enjoys striking dramatic or brooding poses, here and there. Everyone needs a hobby.

I think it's the cane...

And of course just when Barnabas has made his plans just so, guess who springs back in town at just the wrong time?!